Hello All,

As many of you know, I’ve been writing these Catalysts for years. Every week I try to spread knowledge while trying not to be too *prolix (of course, some subjects are easier than others). Now usually I don’t do this. But this week instead of giving you worldly wisdom and ending with a quote. This week, the wisdom IS the quote. Here’s to trying something new every now and then:

“After spending the past ten weeks in class with Eckhart Tolle, studying his book “A New Earth”, I know for sure that I am not my body. I feel more connected to consciousness, or soul, or inner spirit-whatever you choose to name the formless being that is the essence of who we are. I think of all the years I’ve wasted hating myself fat, wanting myself thin. Feeling guilty about every croissant, then giving up carbs, then fasting, then dieting, then worrying when I wasn’t dieting, then eating everything I wanted until the next diet (on Monday or after the holidays or the next big event). Wasted time, abhorring the thought of trying on clothes, wondering what was going to fit, what number the scale would say. All that energy I could have spent loving what is.
Sixteen years ago, when spiritual teacher Marianne Williamson was first on [a] show to talk about her book A “Return to Love”, I asked her why she thought I was having such struggles with my weight. She wrote me a letter saying this: “Until you accept the magnitude of your function, you unconscious mind will sabotage any attempt to show your full magnificence. In fact, if you diet and lose weight, your mind will either put the weight back on or trip up in some other area. In order to lose weight on a permanent basis, you want a shift in your belief about who and what you are. This is the miracle you seek.”
I used to carry that letter around in my purse and pull it out when I felt like overeating. I had the words printed on a card and framed on my desk. And yet I still didn’t get it until recently. Who I am, who you are…we’re not our bodies or the image we hold of them. But because what you give your attention to looms larger-in this case literally--all my focus on weight actually made me fatter.
I can look at a picture from any period of my life, and the first thing that comes to mind is not the event or experience, but my weight and size, because that is how I’ve viewed (and judged) myself--through the prism of numbers.
But I’ve given up scale-watching-letting a number determine how I see myself and whether I’m worthy of a good day. Part of my awakening through the New Earth classes has been to recognize how shallow and small that made me. Aha! So that’s what Marianne meant when she wrote 16 years ago about “the magnitude of your function.” She was right: It is indeed a miracle when you realize the fullness of who you are. You’re not your body, and for sure you’re not your body image.
That’s a free at last kind of recognition. No more wasted time.”

This quote is from media super mogul Oprah Winfrey. Even billionaires have insecurities. Hopefully, you don’t feel so alone now.


Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…
prolix /proh-LIKS/ adjective - unduly prolonged or drawn out: too long

The Catalyst

Greeting to all,

Over the last few Catalysts I’ve shared some words of wisdom that has functioned as my personal *lodestar. It’s funny, though. Most of what I believe now I learned in the last 5 years. What I learned in the first 25 has turned out to be mostly false. Well, let me take that back. I don’t want to say it was ALL false however the beliefs I had didn’t have a good foundation. What I thought I knew about life was embedded in my head as a youth and for some strange reason I never questioned it, even as an adult.
If you’ve read any of my past Catalyst dealing with religion it may have led you to assume I’m Atheist. On the contrary, I’m a believer of God. As a true believer, I’m constantly trying to understand God and my purpose according to that knowledge. It’s ironic how similar faith and fear is. They are both assumptions about the future without tangible evidence. I’ve had to overcome years of religious rhetoric to get to where I am now. That journey has led me down a long, strange road. But at least now I can walk with my head held high knowing that I’m not living a life guided by fear and guilt. You see, God isn’t some bouncer who sits in Heaven determining who gets in. He doesn’t keep track of your good and bad deeds on His Blackberry. God is love. More than that, God is self love. As long as you love yourself, you’re always in God’s presence. You can pay your tithes and offering, take communion, and attend Thursday night prayer but until you realize self love your search for God is in vain.
In conclusion, I will leave you with the final Cata-List detailing the 30 things I’ve learned in 30 years.

10. Everybody will not like you. Find the ones that do and keep it moving.
9. The Bible is not the Words of God. It is simply letters on a page. You, the reader, give it meaning. Why do you think there are so many religions?
8. People who are scared to speak up for themselves are notorious for being liars. They’ll do anything, even if they don’t want to, not to offend others.
7. The world doesn’t owe you anything.
6. Very few men act like the guys in love stories.
5. Very few women act like the ladies in porno.
4. The hardest thing one can do is to be honest with oneself. (The 2nd hardest thing is recognizing the difference between your wants and your needs).
3. It’s your own fault if your life isn’t where you think it should be. No one can hold you back without your permission.
2. Never stop learning. Your education shouldn’t end when you graduate.
1. Jesus loves me. <--This I know.

Thanks to everyone who attended my birthday dinner. I got some good footage for my movie. I know many of you don’t live in Atlanta so I’ll cut you some slack. We always have next year.

“Life is so constructed that an event does not, cannot, and will not match the expectation.” – Charlotte Bronte

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…
lodestar /LOHD-star/ noun - one that serves as an inspiration, model, or guide

The Catalyst

Hello All,


Though most people think they’re the same, wisdom and intelligence are two completely different things. Wisdom is a combination of experience, book smarts, and common sense. Intelligence is the ability to use said wisdom. Intelligence has nothing to do with your I.Q. score. It has nothing to do with GEDs, diplomas, or degrees. Intelligence is determined by what you do with what you know. If I wanted to go to California from Georgia and I’m currently traveling north, one could say that I wasn’t acting intelligently. No matter how *circumspect I have been if I don’t change my route I’ll continue to go in the wrong direction. I could have a PhD in Physics but I’ll never make it to my destination. Just think about that.
Last week, I started listing the 30 things I’ve learned in 30 years to commemorate my impending birthday. I will continue my Cata-List this week and I hope you’ll be able to use something to help keep you going on your chosen road.

20. It is pointless to expect positive results from bad decisions. It is equally as futile to expect positive results from not making any decisions at all.
19. If it doesn’t make sense it’s probably not true.
18. If you build it, they will come. No matter the idea, if you put enough effort in it people will notice.
17. Successful people realize that time is money so they NEVER waste a moment.
16. Excuses are lies wrapped around laziness.
15. You never make it to your destination if you constantly look back.
14. Leaders MUST lead. If no one follows you, you’re just walking.
13. NEVER associate with a religion you don’t fully understand.
Nothing is more powerful than you determination to succeed.
11. Age ain’t nothing but a number. I know children that act like adults and adults that act like children.

(To be continued…)

Thanks to those who responded about my upcoming birthday party. If anyone is still on the fence, you need to go ahead and come. You’ll have plenty of fun. Plus it will help me with my documentary. It’s next Saturday November 22 at 9pm. For more info, reply to this email.

“A stupid man's report of what a clever man says is never accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.” - Bertrand Russell

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…
circumspect /SER-kum-spekt/ adj. - careful to consider all circumstances and possible consequences : prudent

The Catalyst

Hello All,



So many topics, so little time. First things first, I’d like to congratulate America on electing its next President. By voting Barack Obama in for our nation’s highest office, we have officially matured as a nation and should be proud. I won’t elaborate any more on how much this event impacts our everyday lives. Everything that needs to be said has already been stated. I can’t bring anything new to the discussion so I’ll move on with today’s topic.
This month I will be turning 30 years old. I don’t have the dread that some of my peers experience. I actually look forward to it. I feel more like a grown man, a distinguished gentleman if you will. Anyway, to commemorate this momentous occasion I will be having a birthday event on Saturday November 22 at Social (www.socialintown.com) and YOU’RE ALL INVITED! For more info, you can either reply to this email or you can go to my website and click on the calendar. To celebrate my 30th birthday I have developed another Cata-List. These are 30 things I’ve learned in 30 years. These statements ring true from the skyscrapers of Atlanta to the *velds of South Africa. I will be counting down starting at 30 (in no particular order).

30. Your happiness comes first. This may sound selfish but if you put others happiness before your own, you’ll soon burn out.
29. Desire and discipline are the main ingredients of success.
28. Right/wrong and good/evil depends on your personal experiences. Never be ashamed of who you are or who you choose to be.
27. Parents/Teachers/Pastors aren’t always right. Listen cautiously.
26. It’s easier to love than hate. Holding grudges is petty, unproductive, and somewhat arrogant. Forgive him/her and move on.
25. Question everything. God gave you reason for a reason.
24. The beginning of wisdom is recognizing how much you DON’T know.
23. People that start with you won’t always finish with you.
22. Cell phones and cable TV are NOT necessities.
21. Sometimes doing good doesn’t do any good.

(To be continued next week…)

“A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” – Lao Tzu

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you’ve never heard…
veld /velt/ noun - a grassland especially of southern Africa usually with scattered shrubs or trees

The Catalyst

Hello Everyone,


I have a serious question to ask. Do people really change? Notice I didn’t ask if people CAN change. I know it’s possible. But can you teach an old dog new tricks? Is it possible to recognize mistakes, faulty convictions, and unhealthy relationships in order to establish a new identity? In my youth, I had faith that when a person said they were going to change a particular behavior that they would do it. As I advance in years, I have become a little more skeptical.
If I was Santa Clause, I would give you your hearts desire. I really would. Unfortunately, life is not that easy. On the bright side, you can have whatever you want. The problem arises when you figure out what you have to do in order to get it. So you want more money in the bank. That’s easy. All you have to do is save more money than you spend. Of course that would require you to change your spending habits. I know it’s possible to change your spending habits but will you? In these desperate times, depression is on the rise. People are anxious and they’re worried about the future. However, feelings of distress can be overcome in an instant. All one would have to do is be happier more than sad. Being happy won’t cost you anything. It’s a decision you make. But will you? Changing your situation is as easy as changing your thinking. But I find that most people assume change takes years to achieve so they rarely get started. Granted, it can take years but it doesn’t have to take that long to alter your behavior. It only takes a second to quit a bad habit but the person has to want to change. As you already know, most people don’t want to change.
Change is difficult to achieve because it requires us to try something new. Whether it’s a new mindset or a new approach, change is rarely achieved because it requires courage to voyage into the unknown. When you change, you have to get rid of your old identity and establish a new one. However, you don’t know if everyone will like the “new” you. I’m here to tell you chances are they won’t. Your “old” friends will petition for the “old” you to return because the “new’ you brings out their insecurities. This is the main reason why people refuse to change. We get scared because when we change one thing, everything changes (the people you hang out with, the places you go for fun, etc). I will tell you this, though. Change is always worth it. You don’t realize how much you short change (no pun intended) yourself when you refuse to modify your life when needed. The ugly duckling didn’t realize its potential until it got around like-minded swans. You don’t realize how negative your old associates really are until you make new, positive ones. That’s the mystery of life. You’ll never know how *palmary change can be until you take a blind step forward and experience it.

“Nothing is easy to the unwilling.” - Thomas Fuller

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
http://www.rallostyles.com/
http://www.blestbabyproductions.com/


*Word you’ve never heard…
palmary /PAL-muh-ree/ adj. – outstanding; best

The Catalyst

Greetings All,



As you well know, we are witnessing history in American politics. Come January we will have either our first woman vice-president or our first black President. Many have asked that I comment on the current political climate. Granted my eyes stay glued to news, however politics, in general, bore me. But since a few of my avid readers asked me to weigh in, I’d hate to disappoint. It’s been said that one should shy away from expressing opinions on politics and religion. Ahh well…
Let’s start with John McCain. As far as politics goes, McCain has a lot of street cred. He was a POW during the Vietnam War. He’s a reformer so he *indagates corruption in government and makes the appropriate changes. His foreign policy game is tight. I’ve listened to his speeches and they all sound good; if you have a lot of money. When you’re rich, having a republican as President is like having Santa Claus for a father. Under a Republican regime, the rich normally tend to get richer. I can’t hate on that, personally. I’d probably vote for McCain if I was rich. Wait. No I wouldn’t. Because if his health fades, I’d hate to see his vice-president take office. I’m not saying that because she’s a woman. I’m saying that because she doesn’t seem qualified. I’m not going to say she’s dumb because I don’t know her like that. However, her interviewing skills leave me with questions concerning her credentials. She’s excellent at reciting prepared responses and speeches. But anyone who avoids answering simple questions like “What magazines do you read?” couldn’t buy my confidence with all the gold in Ft. Knox (Oh, wait. There isn’t any).
Now let’s talk about Barack Obama. Obama has the knowledge and degrees to prove that he could have been an awesome lawyer. He could have left the ‘hood and not looked back. But instead, he chose to give back. He chose to bring stability to his community. Sarah Palin often mocks Barack for being a community organizer. Although being governor of a state is tedious, it takes a lot of intestinal fortitude to get a group of black people together without fighting, much less getting them to work together for a common purpose. I can’t front. I like Barack. He and I share similar traits. Sure we’re both black men. Sure, we’re both intelligent. But we also get criticized for the same things. Obama often gets criticized for lacking passion. I understand that knock because I often get labeled as unemotional myself. But it is self-defeating to get furious every time someone says something negative about you. Like a true professional, when mindless smearing takes place he keeps it moving. So do I (and so should you for that matter).
So what do you think about John McCain and Sarah Palin? What do you think of Barack Obama and Joe Biden? I believe they are intelligent human beings. I think they all have courage to stand up for what they believe. But it still remains that they’re ALL politicians. I’m a natural born cynic and I have a hard time believing any politicians. They’ll tell you anything to get elected. The speeches look and sound good. The debates show how aggressive and decisive our future president will be. But in the end, will our lives really be that different? Will McCain do what it takes to decrease the price of gas, food, and Rocawear Jeans? Can Obama find a positive female role model in hip-hop culture? I guess only time will tell. Here’s to hoping your candidate wins.

”Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.” - Author Unknown

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com
www.zdream.org (ßOnly a few tickets left. Come check me out this Sunday!!)

*Word you’ve never heard…
indagate /IN-duh-gayt/ verb - to search into: investigate

The Catalyst

Hello All,

When one thinks about the word “addiction”, drugs or alcohol usually come to mind. It’s safe to say that we all know at least one person who has a physical and/or chemical dependency on drugs. If not, we can see them walking the streets, day or night, looking for their next fix. We give them money. We give them pity. On a bad day, we look down our noses at them. “At least, I’m not doing that bad” is what we sometimes say to our self with a slight sigh of relief. Little do we realize that we are not too different from the fiends we see on the street. Whether we admit it or not, we ALL have addictions. Don’t think so? Follow me.
You don’t have to be dependent on drugs or alcohol to be an addict. Some people are addicted to gambling. Gambling is not a drug. Some people are addicted to shopping. Clothes are not drugs. Some are addicted to pornography. However, DVDs and magazines are not drugs. In these situations, no chemicals are involved yet the addict can’t seem to get enough. Before we go any further, we have to make sure that we understand what an addiction is. This is the easiest definition for addiction: something you can’t stop. If you can’t stop smoking cigarettes, you’re addicted. If you can’t stop being in meaningless relationships, you’re addicted. I’ve given plenty of examples of different types of addictions. But there is one addiction that I want to focus on. That is your addiction to feelings.
You see, you can get addicted to your emotions just as easily as drugs. The hypothalamus is a part of your brain that produces a chemical for every emotion you feel. Happiness has a chemical. Anxiety has a completely different chemical. So does envy, anger, depression, etc. And like a junkie, you can get addicted to these chemicals (or emotions) if you expose yourself to them long enough. This is good news if you’re addicted to joy. Because the “happiness” chemical flows through your body making you feel exuberant. These chemicals make your skin radiate, it keeps your immune system strong, and it gives you that twinkle in your eye that brightens the day of everyone you come in contact with. The bad news is some of us are addicted to the wrong emotions. For example, take sadness. Some people have gotten so used to being unfulfilled that they are addicted to it. These people are so far gone that they aren’t happy unless they’re sad. If they go too long without getting the “sadness” chemical they crave, they will create a situation that will make them sad (or angry or resentful) thus getting their beloved fix. This may sound crazy but it not. It’s actually quite common. Think about it. How often do you feel overwhelmed by life? If you can’t stop feeling depressed, chances are you’re addicted. If your *bilious attitude causes you to lose friends, spouses, and/or jobs, you’re no different than a person addicted to meth or heroine.
Overcoming addictions takes work, I know more than I care to elaborate. But it’s not impossible. If you’ve ever seen someone struggle with an addiction, you know the first thing the addict has to do is admit they have a problem. Strangely enough, that’s the hardest step. Most people don’t think they have a problem. But if you have more bad days than good, you have an addiction and it’s only a matter of time before you OD. You need to seek a counselor like any other addict. Keep in mind, there is nothing wrong with admitting you have a problem. Nor is seeking help a sign of weakness. Keeping your emotions in check is pivotal to your health. And if anyone or anything tries to get you to feel bad, “Just say NO!”

“We may think there is will power involved, but more likely… change is due to want power. Wanting the new addiction more than the old one. Wanting the new me in preference to the person I am now.” – George Sheehan

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…
bilious /BILL-yus/ adjective - sickeningly unpleasant

The Catalyst

Hello Everyone,



It amazes me how often confidence gets mistaken for arrogance. I’m not exactly sure when having high self-esteem took on a negative connotation but heaven forbid anybody have a little pride. As soon as you give yourself credit there is someone there to try and pull you back down the proverbial crab barrel. I don’t know about you but I get sick and tired of people trying to “shrink” me.
Is it my fault that I’m so awesome? God was in a good mood when he created me. What can I say? I’m blessed with dashing good looks. I have an uncanny ability to see the lesson in tribulation. I use those lessons to pen a *circumlocution I call “The Catalyst”. I can’t help the fact that no one on Earth can do what I do. To some, the preceding statements sound like a rant from an individual with a runaway ego. But you would be wrong. Sure, I’m the most important person on Earth. But guess what? So are you. You may wonder why you don’t get the appreciation that you feel you deserve. One reason is because you still haven’t realized how magnificent you are. Like me, there is only one “you”. And only you can do what you can do. No one can love like you. Nobody will sing like you. You, my friend, are one of a kind. The problem is you have been taught for so long that you aren’t special. Society has its way of getting people to conform. Everyone is created equal, right? Look around. Nobody is created equal. We are simply created. Nothing more, nothing less. What we do with our abilities is what separates us. However, most judge themselves based on a scale crafted by others. Come on. Be truthful. You bought that shirt because the style looked good on someone else. You think that just because you wear the identical shirt that people will look at you with the same admiration. But a shirt doesn’t change who you are. Although you may seem different, you’re the same person after the purchase that you were before. The only difference is you’re about $200 dollars poorer.
Life is not about worrying what others think. Commercials, MTV, and fashion magazines attempt to tell you who you should be and what ranks as the status quo. But life is not about “them”. It’s all about how you feel about yourself. People will respect you as much as you respect yourself. But remember: No one can handle your divine radiance in full so you will have to tone down from time to time. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s not that you’re being fake or selling out. It’s just that the world isn’t ready for your unmatched vivacity. So the next time your order isn’t right at Mickey D’s, don’t get mad. They’re only human. The next time someone dismisses one of your ideas. Cut them some slack. They don’t know any better. Compared to you, they’re an idiot. I know it and you know it. The highlight of their day is hoping to merely have some kind of effect on you. It’s not they’re fault. You’re just too awesome. They know it and I know it.

“I LOVE ME SOME ME!!” - Terrell Owens

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
http://www.rallostyles.com/
http://www.blestbabyproductions.com/


*Word you’ve never heard…
circumlocution /ser-kum-loh-KYOO-shun/ noun - the use of an unnecessarily large number of words to express an idea

The Catalyst

Greetings everyone,

One thing people notice when they first meet me is my ridiculous sense of humor. Most expect me to be a staunch intellectual. Though that is an accurate description, my wit comes as a surprise to the majority. Sure, I can open your mind to all the secrets of the universe but I can also have you laughing so hard you’ll wet your pants. No I’m not tooting my own horn. I really am that funny. Adding humor to your life makes things bearable. One of my favorite TV shows is “Seinfeld”. Everybody has their favorite Seinfeld episode and I’m going to use my favorite as a topic for discussion in this edition of the Catalyst.
The episode in which I’m talking about is very dear to my heart. In this episode, George analyzes his life and he doesn’t like the results he has gotten. So in his infinite wisdom, he decides that no matter what situation he found himself in he would do the exact opposite of what he normally does. In the course of changing his behavior, his outcomes changed as well. George found by doing the opposite he had better results. The positive results reflected in his personal, social, and work life. Sure, this episode was far-fetched like all the other Seinfeld episodes but don’t miss the point. There is a lot of truth said in jest. The fact of the matter is if you want different results it may be a good idea to change the way you do things.
I know it’s hard to change. You’ve been “you” for so long. You have your habits. You have your natural reactions. You have your tendencies. But after all that, you still have to wonder if your way is effective. Are the actions you are currently taking leading you in the direction in which you want to go? If not, why are you still doing them? Sure these are simple questions and really the answers are simple as well. We all want to be successful. But hardly anyone wants to do what it takes to be successful, especially when it comes to changing your mindset. There is no way to succeed in your comfort zone. Your methods will need adjustment as you go through life. If you still believe, speak, and act in the same way you did 5 years ago you are not progressing and more than likely the world is passing you by. Your situation will change when you do. If you don’t change, you’ll still be surrounded by the same family/friends that don’t support you. You’ll still work the job that gives you no satisfaction. More than that, you’ll still feel the same sad, depressed, why-can’t-I-get-a-break feelings you’ve been experiencing for years.
I know that many of you won’t change because of your *refractory thinking. However, for those of us who are fed up learn from George. If you want opposite results, do the opposite of what you’ve been doing. If you want a husband, quit dating no good (fill in your own blank). If you want a wife, quit messing with gold-digging (fill in your own blank). The negative results you get occur not because Satan wants you to be unhappy nor is it God testing your patience. You don’t have what you want in life because of faulty decision making. Once you realize success is waiting for you to think and behave like an adult, you’ll find your journey to the top a little easier (and quicker). I’m not saying the way you do things is wrong. But the facts remain that if you knew better, you’d do better.

“It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory.” - W. Edwards Deming


Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you’ve never heard…
refractory /rih-FRAK-tuh-ree/ adj. - stubborn, unmanageable: resisting control or authority

The Catalyst

Hello All,


Have you ever wondered what prevents people from reaching their goals? There is no singular reason but more like combinations. Maybe it’s just not the right time. Some failures exist because a person is thriving while doing the wrong thing. And let’s face it, some folks are just plain lazy. One of the biggest reasons for stagnancy is not taking advantage of opportunities. Life presents multiple opportunities everyday which go unnoticed. I think it’s high time we started taking advantage.
There is an idea out that opportunities are few and far between. For example, you may hear someone say that there are not any jobs out there. From my experience, there is plenty of work to be done. It just depends on what you’re willing to do. Some think that certain jobs (janitor, fast food, etc) are beneath them. So instead of working for minimum wage, they choose to sit around the house and complain getting paid less than minimum wage. I never understood that logic but, then again, most people don’t understand my logic. But I digress. The point I’m trying to make is just because you start at the bottom doesn’t mean you’re doomed to stay there. Cream rises to the top. No matter what a successful person does, he/she will always move up. It’s a mentality. Anyone who owns a business will tell you that a good worker is hard to come by. If you do your job with excellence there is no way you will ever get fired nor will you have to ask for a raise. Nobody wants to lose their best worker. I’ve heard it said that opportunity normally comes with a *visage of hard work. I don’t think opportunity wears a disguise at all. Opportunity is merely matter of time and chance. It is what you make of it.
Another thing about opportunity is that you need to be prepared when it’s present. ALWAYS! You can’t always see opportunity when it knocks so it’s good to be equipped. Preparation is like car insurance. You don’t always need it but it’s good to have just in case. As some of you may know, I act on my spare time. I’ve been in countless stage plays, commercials, and I’ve even had minor movie roles. Of course, I haven’t really gained too much from these particular opportunities other than good friendships, peace of mind, and memories. However, whenever the opportunities are available, I’m ALWAYS ready. You never know where it will lead. That’s the good thing about life. Hope and peace are like Siamese twins. You can’t have one without the other. Maybe that’s not the best analogy. Ah, well…
I know that when it comes to success all you need is to get your foot in the door. I also know that one of the hardest things to do is get your foot in said door. Luckily, you don’t have to compel opportunity. Opportunities avail themselves all day, everyday. I’m sure you would find great success if you would just see your goals through to the end (i.e. quit starting and not finishing). Like God, the tooth fairy, and Bigfoot, opportunity exists depending on the believer. If you don’t believe there are opportunities out there, you’re right. If you DO believe that opportunities exist, you’re right. It all depends on you, the individual. One can always be led to food but no one can be forced to eat.

“Grasp your opportunities, no matter how poor your health; nothing is worse for your health than boredom.” - Mignon McLaughlin

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you’ve never heard…
visage /VIZ-ij/ noun – aspect or appearance

The Catalyst

Greetings Everyone,

We all have a daily routine. Sure, there are variances but for the most part everything we do is repetition. Repetition is good. It helps us form habits which we use to become productive members of society. We wake up, turn off the alarm, and begin our day. We brush our teeth. We shower (hopefully). We get dressed and the off to work we go. Although our daily schedule can become monotonous, repetition gives us stability in an otherwise unstable world. But I would be doing a great injustice if I didn’t give you the dark side of repetition.
Telling your spouse you love them everyday is wonderful. Repeatedly hugging your kids is also virtuous. Praying, meditating, and being thankful are all actions in which repetition is ideal. However, I want to talk about the things you do repeatedly that have a negative impact on your life. Let’s start with the alarm going off in the morning. You turn it off. Then, you go to the bathroom. You then wash your hands and get the “sleep” out of your eyes. Now, these actions are pretty standard and not so detrimental. Then it happens. You look in the mirror and notice how much weight you’ve gained. Or, as in my case, you notice how much hair you’ve lost. Or you noticed how much older you look now. Once you’ve finished pointing out how much you’ve changed, you go to the closet. After reminiscing how your clothes used to fit, you commence to beat yourself up some more because you clothes are outdated. Sound familiar? From that point, you go to your car that you constantly complain about and drive to work. After enduring an hour of road rage and traffic, you arrive at your job that you desperately want to quit. Once the excruciating 8 hours are up, you proceed to fight rush hour traffic to get home only to find a family eagerly awaiting dinner or a wife impatiently waiting on the excuse you have as to why the washing machine is still not working. Do you see what I’m getting at? Does this describe your usual day? If so, no wonder you can’t wait for the next Catalyst to come out (just kidding…but a little serious).
Now, I know that your days don’t follow the schedule that I laid out in the previous paragraph. I described a day in this way to prove a point. If you practice something consistently you will eventually get good at it. That’s fine if you are taking piano lessons. It’s not so good if you belittle yourself over and over because your living situation isn’t perfect. If you regularly focus on your shortcomings, how can you expect to have any decent level of self esteem? So what if you car doesn’t have air conditioning? At least you have a car. So what if you’re “looking” old. Some people won’t live as long as you. So what if your job sucks? Everybody’s job sucks. The longer you live, the more you’ll find out that your situation isn’t as unique as you think it is. The key to life isn’t worrying about what you don’t have. Look, I’m as *impecunious as the next person but I stay grateful for what little I do have. Would I like to have more? Absolutely, but I don’t make the mistake of equating happiness with having “more”. More money, a bigger house, and/or a better job won’t make you any happier than you are right now. It won’t give you joy because if you equate “more” with happiness you’ll never be satisfied because you’ll come to the conclusion that happiness = more and you will never have enough. Insatiability is the soil in which the seeds of greed grow. Always be thankful for what you have because “more” is never guaranteed.

“Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth” – Franklin D. Roosevelt


Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
http://www.rallostyles.com/
http://www.blestbabyproductions.com/


*Word you’ve never heard…

impecunious /im-pih-KYOO-nee-uss/ adj. - having very little or no money usually habitually

The Catalyst

Salutations,



The mind is extraordinary. The mysteries that surrounds it is vast. I’m not talking about your brain (although it is incredible in its own right). With proper equipment, I can see your brain. I can weigh it if I wanted. I could smell and touch it. But I will never see your mind. It doesn’t have an odor. As a matter of fact, it’s hard to even describe your mind. Though a description of the mind is fleeting, I can tell you how it works.
To put it simply, your mind is like a video recorder. It has recorded everything you have ever done. The information recorded influences EVERY decision you make. Though some of us have more to remember than others, one never “forgets” anything. I know what you’re thinking. “If I don’t forget anything, how come there are certain things from my past I can’t remember”. I’m so glad you asked I’m beside myself with glee. You see, you only focus on what you choose to remember. Adversely, you don’t focus on what you deem as unnecessary. Some of us choose NOT to focus on good things in our life because we see them as temporary flukes in an otherwise miserable existence. It’s hard to succeed with a *weltanschauung like this. Others choose to NOT focus on the negative because we feel that pain is a brief inconvenience that we must endure for the privilege of living in a limitless universe. This is the mind of a champion. What you remember depends heavily on the type of person you are. If you’re an optimist, chances are you remember all the good things that you’ve experienced. You remember all of the accomplishments you’re proud of. You can recall how you felt when you graduated. You know how you felt the first time you fell in love. Speaking of your first time…well never mind, you’ll always remember that. When you recall all of the positives in your life, you will literally amaze yourself. Your self-esteem will skyrocket and you couldn’t help but think, “How can one person be so lucky”. But on the other hand, if you are a negative person you probably remember every failure. You can recall each time you tried and it didn’t work. You dwell on times when someone took advantage of you. You remember when your parents divorced. Oh yeah, how can you forget the time you tried to start your own business and fell flat on your face? Life can be so cruel when all you spotlight is the times when you didn’t measure up. There are a lot of things I don’t know. There are a lot of things I do know. What I do know is that there is no reason for a God in Heaven to punish us. We punish ourselves enough here on Earth everyday.
Protect your mind, folks. Your mind is the most powerful asset you have. That is why it is so important you use it carefully. Your mind determines not only how you see the world but how you see yourself and others around you. If all you can remember is pain and anguish, guess how you will see the world. If you can’t appreciate past successes no matter how insignificant they may seem, how in the world can you expect future success? If you can’t see success in your mind, you can never have it in reality. That, my friend, is visualization. You must visualize before anything will materialize. You must learn to dream big. If you continue to think small, you will continue to have a small car, a small house, and a small bank account. Remember: You can’t have what you can’t see.

"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; small minds discuss peaple" - Eleanor Roosevelt

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…

Weltanschauung /VELT-ahn-show-ung (“ow” as in “cow”)/ noun - a comprehensive conception or apprehension of the world especially from a specific standpoint

The Catalyst

Hello All,


I hope everyone enjoyed their 4th of July weekend. You would think with a moniker like "The All-American" that I would have celebrated more than I did. While most of you were grilling, lighting fireworks, and socializing, I was at work watching another Law & Order marathon. Sure, I didn't celebrate my independence in a traditional way. But I did take the time out to reflect on what it means to be free.
You may have not realized but our U.S. Constitution is a work of pure genius. Sure it has its flaws like anything else man-made, but the fact remains that our nation is the best in the world. There are people who would disagree with the previous statement but I don't think my opinion is without merit. People risk life and limb to get into this country and take advantage of opportunities we seem to look over. Where else can you be born in the most dire of circumstances and die a multi-billionaire? In most countries, if you are born poor you are destined to die poor. And your children will die poor. And their children...well you get the point. At least in America you have a chance. There are no guarantees but at least you can have hope. And hope is the gas that fuels aspirations.
I live in an "urban" area. You know what that means. A bunch of shoe stores, chinese food restaraunts, and liquor stores most of which are owned by immigrants. I'm not a hater. I don't mind when people from oversees come over and start businesses. But you do have people that feel that immigrants are presented with opportunities not available to U.S. citizens. Sure, there are programs in place so that legal aliens can start their own businesses. But there are also programs in place to help U.S. citizens start businesses as well (ask that guy on all the commercials with the question marks on his blazer). I may come under fire for what I'm about to say but it's what I believe so (fill in your own blank) it. I agree with former President Reagan. I don't believe people suffer because of lack of resources. Most people can't have the things they want because they have a jog trot* not conducive with success. I think that the U.S. provides plenty of opportunity for upward mobility (and I'm not talking about food stamps, Section 8 housing, or affirmative action). It's just that people either don't know where to get help or they don't want it. No matter the situation, it's no one's fault except for the individual if he/she can't get a piece of the American Pie. Hard times fall on everybody. But if you are truly determined to be a success, no one has the ability to stop you. No one but YOU, of course.
Enjoy your independence people. Don't follow the crowd. Be your own person. Don't get it twisted, though. Independence brings loneliness because most people would rather think like the group instead of outside the box. It's easy to take freedom for granted when its all you've ever known. You have the right to say what you want. So speak up! You have the right to assemble. So throw a party! You have the right to choose your own religion. So go ahead and choose which god you want to give all your money to. This is American, Ladies and Gentlemen. Enjoy your liberty. There are opportunities all around. If you're not going to use them, move and let some one else take advantage.

"He who does not enjoy solitude will not love freedom." -- Arthur Schopenhauer

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you've never heard...

jog trot /JOG-TROT/ noun - a routine habit or course of action

The Catalyst

Hello all,

Tell me if you've been in this situation. You have a car. Whether you bought the car used or you've just had it a long time it is in need of repairs. You go back and forth to the mechanic and nothing seems to help. You keep throwing money at the problem hoping a miracle occurs to keep your car running. But alas, the car issues persist. The vehicle that once provided you with reliable transportation has become a liability. What do you do with this high maintenance vehicle? Of course, you get rid of it. Let me pose another question. If you wouldn't put up with a vehicle that's high maintenence, why do you put up with an individual that is high maintenance?
I think we are all familiar with the high maintenance person. The person who always comes over and eats your food but never contributes monetarily nor cleans up afterward. The overbearing parent. The constant complainer. Growing up, I was under the false impression that "high maintenance" only referred to spoiled, money-hungry women. As I matured, I had to broaden my definition to include anyone whose mere presence costs you more energy than it's worth. Throughout my life, I've met plenty of high maintenance folks. I fall victim to these people because I have a tendency to want to please everybody (I'm the first born so it kind of comes with the territory). As impossible as that sounds, I still try only to find myself exhausted, resentful, and sometimes broke. I don't know why but I have the hardest time saying "no". The fear of not pleasing someone has gotten me in some of the worst situations. I used to think that accomodating everyone that asked for a favor was commendable. But if you're as co-dependent as I am, that gets old real quick. So what do you do when you want your life back? That's easy. You take control (notice I said "take").
High maintenance friends and family will suck you dry if you let them. Constant requests for money, a ride, etc. will weigh down even the most energetic individual. What makes it worse is the fact that it's not the other person's fault. YOU are the one that chooses to spread yourself thin to make someone else happy (who 9 times out of 10 won't even appreciate it, although they expect you to accomodate every time). Saying "no" is the first step to emotional independence. "No"sounds so negative. I realize that. But if you go around saying "yes"to every request, you will never have time to focus on your own needs. Subconsciously, we sometimes put other people's needs in front of ours so we don't have to focus on our own problems. Then we can say, "If I didn't help so and so, I would have been able to (fill in your own blank)". This is known as a built-in excuse. It's a pretty slick cop-out that will keep you stuck in a morass*(<--it's not what it sounds like) if you won't recognize it.
Ridding yourself of high maintenance people should be your #1 priority. The person who is always interrupting your conversations, the person who can't catch a break, the terminally cranky, the chronic worrier, and the hypochondriac are just a few of the high maintenance people that you need to break away from. I know it's hard. Most of the time these are your friends and/or family. When you decide to take your life back, they will be the first ones to tell you that you've changed and you don't look out for them anymore. However, keep in mind that it is not your responsibility to make their life easier. Offering help should be a choice not an obligation.

"Our dependency makes slaves out of us, especially if this dependency is a dependency on our self-esteem. If you need encouragement, praise, pats on the back from everybody, then you make everybody your judge."- Author Unknown

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you've never heard...

morass /muh-RASS/ noun - a situation that traps, confuses, or impedes

The Catalyst

Salutations,

I'm a firm believer that pure unadulterated thought is our single most important possession. Sure, we may have a place to live. If we're lucky, we own a car. But our most significant asset is our thoughts. Our thoughts are important because quite simply they are the only things we possess that can't be taken away. Many of us know the feeling of stepping outside thinking our car is stolen only tofind out its been hijacked by the repo man. There were at least 1200 home forclosures in my county alone last month. It's funny how wei nvest time, money, and effort into material possessions that can be taken away at any moment but won't invest the same energy in anything eternal.
Times are hard for everyone these days. The economy is weak and I don't see it strengthening in the near future. Some people ask the question, "why?" We want to know who's responsible for the state ofthe Union. What could we have changed in the past that would have resulted in different results? We want to blame and point fingers at politicians and big businesses. It's easier to blame them than adapt and adjust to the new economic environment. I'll admit. Money is tight. But I don't let it get to me. As always, I've got to stay positive. I realize that there are limits to what can be taken away from me. Luckily, no one can take away my true assets. Peace of mind is always available until you give someone a piece. No one can force you to worry. No one forces you to be anxious. After extensive practice, I've learned that my financial situation doesn't define who I am. Although it pays the bills, my job is somewhat unfulfilling. I discovered, however, that I am so much more than my title. I am more than what I see in the mirror. I am the sum of my thoughts. My thoughts determine who I am. And so does yours. That is why it matters how you think. If your thinking is flawed, you will only reach a fraction of your potential. I would go into detail but after 3 years you should trust me by now.
This is why I write The Catalyst. I want you to accept the fact that instead of rims, clothes, and cars we need to invest in our mind/thoughts. That may be easier said than done but the mind is the only thing of value. You won't be able to take any of your material possessions when you die. So I ask you, are your possessions really that important? Most of the things we stress over and think are essential won't even matter a year from now. There are many things happening in the universe right now although most of us are only aware of what is happening in front of our eyes. I know it seems like the end of the world but you will get past your current situation just like you've gotten past everything else. We, as a country, have experienced a recession before. Yes, it sucked but the world didn't end. If you're like me you've had a few jobs over the years. I don't consider it a tragedy if I lose one. If/when push comes to shove I'll just get another one. In my experience, its plenty of jobs available (if you're not picky). How vain to believe that certain jobs (janitor,waitress, fast food rep, etc.) are beneath us. We would rather sit at home broke instead of working for minimum wage. I guess in a way it makes sense (in Bizarro World).
In times like these, you must focus. There are alot of things that will *etiolate your energy and motivation. Yes, you're in debt. Yes, gas prices are high. But it is possible to think your way out of a crisis. Everything you will ever need in life you already have. The materials you obtain is extra and of no consequence considering the big picture.

"The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them." - Albert Einstein

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
http://www.rallostyles.com/
http://www.blestbabyproductions.com/

*Word You've Never Heard...

etiolate /EE-tee-uh-layt/ verb - to deprive of natural vigor: to make feeble

The Catalyst

Bon Jour,

One of the strangest occurences in human endeavor is our tendency to miss the point. You know the drill. You're telling a story and there's always that one person who focuses on minute details and can't see the overall picture. Or, you're involved in a spirited debate and your opponent brings up irrelevant data to mask the fact they don't know what they're talking about. It's frustrating because once someone has missed the point, chances are, they will never get it. Throughout time we have learned a lot about our existence. For the most part, we know how our earthly bodies function. We know that, with science, certain phenomena can be explained. We now know that tornadoes, earthquakes, and avalanches are not punishment sent down from Heaven but the effects of climate changes. Although searching through the known has its benefits, I have always been interested in the unknown. I have the heart of an explorer. I like to find out new things and spread the knowledge. To discover, my friend, is the key to a more fulfilled life. And to live a fulfilled life is the point, right?
Now, when I say discover I don't mean you have to go on an Indiana Jones-type of expedition. A simple way to explore is to read. With a book you can travel around the Universe without leaving your room. There is so much I have a learned about life and myself by picking up a book. There is no sensation equivalent to learning something new. Like they say, "there's nothing like your first time". I like science and history. My home is chockablock* with books ranging from quantum physics to ancient cooking. I know my interests are boring subjects for most but don't miss the point! The point is to read what YOU are interested in. When you develop your interests you can continue on to explore the next level.
The next level is self exploration. Since self exploration sounds naughty, I'll use the term mind exploration. Some would argue that mind exploration should come first. I disagree. I believe we are born with a blank slate. Over time, we learn to become who we. Your personality is a direct reflection of what you've experienced with your 5 senses. You are the sum total of your experiences. You want to know why you're always sad? It's because you've gotten so used to feeling bad that it is "normal" for you. You don't expect much so you don't get much. That is why it is key to know and accept ourselves. When we "find" ourselves, we can finally be honest. We can finally admit that we procrastinate. We spend more money than we save. Sometimes, regretfully, we follow our emotions and not logic. Congratulations, you aren't perfect! That doesn't give you the right to not appreciate yourself. We are raised to be humble. We are raised to not bring attention to ourselves. Don't rock the boat. Be honest, most of us were raised to "fit in". It isn't until we are older (and crazier) we realize that we don't want to fit in. We want to be accepted for who we are. Little did we know, we could have been ourselves and no one would have known the difference. Take the time to explore your mind. Decide who you want to be. (Remember that there are NO wrong answers) How do you want to dress? Funky, colorful, and/or modern. How do you want to look? Sexy, vibrant, and/or demure. What kind of friends do you want? Supportive ones or the associates you already have who always have some foul (fill in your own blank) to say. Explore yourself to find out which one of these scenarios works for you. It may take time but it's fun. Discovering YOU is an exhileration that can't be matched. If you only knew how awesome "you" are...
Don't spend your life "fitting in". Be the "YOU" you were meant to be. There are so many people who are missing the point of life everday. Everybody can't drive an Escalade. So quit working so hard just to say you own one. You think you were meant to work so hard that you can't enjoy the fruits of your labor? You think you are supposed to be so tired that you can't play with your kids? You mean to tell me that you are destined to be scared, stressed, and unhappy on a daily basis? My friend, that is not living. Don't miss the point of life by focusing on situations that you can't control (and won't even remember in a few years).


"A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He knows the 'why' for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any 'how'." --Victor Frankl

Dream Big. Live Bigger.



The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you've never heard...

chockablock /CHAH-kuh-blahk/ adj. - very full

The Catalyst

Hello everyone,



There is a saying that states that the road to Hell is paved withgood intentions. I don't think that it is necessarily the good intentions that lead you down the path of destruction. I think its the natural inclination of human beings to live their lives based offof the past that lead people astray. Now, it is one thing to look at the negative effects of our salad days* in order to not repeat it. Itis a different thing to hold onto an idea that is clearly faulty merely because you don't won't to admit you were wrong.
We've all been in the situation in some form. You said you wanted tohang out but when the weekend hit, you were tired. You told yourfriends you would hang out so you go, even though you would rather goto bed. You end up going out and bringing everybody down because you don't want to be there. Now, no one is having fun. Alot of good that did. You should have just stayed at home. But you didn't, did you? Ok, you don't like that example. Let's use something that hits closerto home. You said your vows at the alter. 6 months down the road you both know that you made a mistake. But no one wants to admit it. Your parents told you to wait. Your friends told you that you weren'tready. But you were in love. Notice I said you WERE in love. But once the high came down you realized that you two can't see eye to eyeon ANYTHING! Funny how perspectives change when you have to be around a person day in and day out. Now, there is a decision that has to be made (and choosing not to make a decision is a decision in itself). Do you call it quits and admit that you BOTH made a mistake? Or do you save face by staying in a fruitless marriage just because you want to be right. Nobody wants to hear, "I told you so." If I've said itonce, I've said it a thousand times: Being right is the Booby Prize in life. It's better to find out what's right than who's right.
Alot of times, we hang on to decisions we've made in the past because we like to be a man/woman of our word. I know our word should be our bond. But if you're like me, sometimes you change your mind. And when you change your mind, there is always going to be that one person there to remind you of what you said previously. I'll let you in on a secret. What you said in the past was how you felt THEN. It may not apply now. If it doesn't apply now. Why hold on to it? Has anyone ever tried to put you in check because you changed your mind? I guess I'm the only one. Anyway, people want you to stick to what you said. They want you to be the same old you. If you start changing then they're going to have to start changing. But it is my right to change my mind anytime. As an actor, I come across other artists. Every week, I hear someone say I'm quitting my job to pursue my dreams. I applaud that. But I also know that is an incredibly hard task. I've seen people literally struggle because they won't admit that they bit off more than they could chew. There is this guy (that I only seem to see when I'm in front of a mirror) who suffers from this condition. I know having a 9-5 isn't glamorous but it pays the bills. Being a starving artist isn't cool nor is it commendable. If your craft can't feed you maybe you should put in a few resumes. We all know it's not forever but for right now get that paycheck.
The past can haunt in many ways. Of course, repeating past failures is pointless. But, as I mentioned, staying faithful to a counterproductive idea for the mere fact that only YOU think its flawless is contemptibly ignorant. Which is easier, holding on or letting go? The answer to this question is the key to life. Use it to open the door to your aspirations.

"We can spend our lives letting the world tell us who we are. Sane orinsane. Saints or sex addicts. Heros or victims. Letting history tellus how good or bad we are.Letting our past decide our future. Or we can decide for ourselves. ...maybe it's our job to invent something better."
--Chuck Palahniuk


Dream Big. Live Bigger.




The All-American
http://www.rallostyles.com/
http://www.blestbabyproductions.com/*

Term you've never heard...

salad days /SAL-ud-DAYZ/ - time of youthful inexperience or indiscretion

The Catalyst

Salutations,

Last year I wrote a Catalyst that dealt with the role denial plays in our life. I detailed how we choose what we focus on and what we accept as truth. Today, I wanted to take it a little light. I decided to bless you with another Cata-List. This is a list of 10 things that we know are true but will never admit:

Gas prices are not going down. I hate to be the one to tell you. Those $3 gallon gas days are a thing of the past. The sooner you accept this fact the better.

9 out of 10 reality shows are scripted. The ones that are not scripted are edited to make random acts look like a story. Pure genius!

You should have savings account. Any rich person will tell you that.

You can live without your cell phone. Believe it or not, you can live without cable TV. It’s not good to put these items on the same level as food, air, and water.

YOU are the problem in the relationship not the other person.

Faith in God doesn’t guarantee peace.

The media doesn’t report the news anymore. It manufactures simple stories and blows them out of proportion to hide the fact that no one is doing any real investigative journalism.

Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, and Mike Tyson will never make the come back you want them to.

Although you look at him as a luftmensch*, being President is a hard job. Do you think you can do better? I doubt it.

In this life, you’ll never have a clue as to what’s going on. You’ll always be a step behind. (The trick is to have quick reflexes and go with the flow)

Bonus:

For black people: Hip-Hop is dead. It died as soon as it went Pop. Yeah, people still Dj, Breakdance, MC, and spray graffiti. But hip-hop was developed to go against the status quo. Now, Hip Hop is the status quo. Hip-Hop is mainstream and it’s nobody’s fault really. That’s why rap music now isn’t like how rap music was, then. Who knew it would catch on?

For white people: O.J. didn’t do it.

“The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it. We fear that if we do not have love we will be unhappy.” -Richard Bach



Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com


*Word you’ve never heard…
Luftmensch / LOOFT-mensh/ noun - an impractical contemplative person having no definite business or income

The Catalyst

Good Afternoon,

Throughout my observations I try to find various analogies andmetaphors in which I can use as an omphalos* to explain the ups anddowns of our lives. I recently came up with a creative analogy whileplaying cards with my friends. Hopefully, you all know how to playSpades. If you don't, you should follow the advice of Katt Williamsand get some "(fill in your own blank) friends" or you probably won'tunderstand this particular Catalyst. When I play Spades, my partnerand I are constantly on the look out for our "10" hand. Whether youcall it your "10 hand", the "pound", or the "wheels" basically youwant to bid 10 because if you make it, you get 200 points, otherwiseknown as "10 for 2" (or at least that's how we play. You know Spadesrules differ by region). Every time I play Spades I patiently wait,hand after hand, until I get a good enough hand to bid 10. Any timeI'm involved in a game and I'm fortunate enough to bid 10 and get it,my team generally wins. If I don't get to bid 10 or I bid 10 and get"set", a loss is usually eminent. Win my team is down in points, Inever get too worried. I always tell my opponents I'm just waiting onmy "10 hand". In life, we have a similar desire. Aren't we all justwaiting on our "10 hand"? Aren't we all just waiting for that momentwhen our patience, hard work, and determination ends in a big payday? Follow me as I explain how to get "10 for 2" in Spades and in life. There are 3 simple steps and I will explain as thoroughly as I can.

Step 1:

In the game of Spades, as in life, you have to play with the cardsyou are dealt. Sometimes you get a bad hand. It's really nobody'sfault if you don't get the cards you want. We have no control overhow tall we will be, the color of our hair, or our complexion. Wehave no control over who our parents are. Some people are born into alife of luxury. Some are born dirt poor. Some people's parents loveeach other and are still married. Some parents get divorced. Somechildren are born into loving families while others of us are not asfortunate. We have no control over the cards we receive but aseasoned player will never let the cards dictate victory or defeat. Aveteran realizes that he/she has a partner and a good Spades partnercan carry the load in a high pressure "10 hand". If you don't have agood Spades partner, or life partner (spouse, best friend, mentor,etc.), success is merely a mirage. Contrary to popular opinion, youcannot make it on your own. You will ALWAYS need somebody else'shelp. Always!

Step 2:

Once you have your cards, the next thing you have to do is bid your hand. You have to set your goals. As the cliché goes, you can't goanywhere without having a destination. It kills me how many peopledon't know what they want out of life. You know the person. They say they want to go back to school but you ask them want they want tomajor in and they reply, "I don't know". In my generation, there areplenty of grown "kids" that still don't know what they want to be when they grow up. I hate to see people get depressed about turning 30 andnot being where they thought they would be. It's not that we can't have what we want. Most of us, myself included, have a ridiculouslyunrealistic time table that we work from. Not everyone can be marriedby 25. We can't all have a house by 30. Sure, retiring by 35 isideal but for most of us, especially those who dream big, the realityis that those big dreams require time and patience in order to becomea reality. We sometimes end up delaying our success because we try toforce situations to match our ideas. We try to force our way ontoMr./Mrs. Right only to find out they weren't worth our time. Now we have to start all over. We run into the same scenarios in our careers. Most of us would like to own our own business. Am I right? Even though that is our goal, we settle for working for thesecorporations because they promise us a steady paycheck, 2 weeks ofvacation time, and 401k. There is no way you can accomplish yourfinancial goals working a 40-hour workweek. As if that isn't enough,we have the nerve to get indignant when we get downsized because thereare workers in India who are willing to do our jobs for half the pay. It's business, nothing personal. Make sure you set goals. It may seemsilly to write down what you want but trust me it's necessary. Likeany professional Spades player will tell you, there is no worsefeeling in the world than getting 10 "books" when you didn't bid it.

Step 3:

The last and most important step in achieving "10 for 2" success isto actually win the 10 books. Getting the right cards and bidding 10mean absolutely nothing if you don't play the hand (correctly). Taking action is the hardest thing to do when striving to achievegoals. Triumphant action requires concentration, courage, andtenacity. Concentration, or focus, requires that we tune outEVERYTHING that doesn't help us reach our goal(s). This is hardbecause most of us can't focus for 15 minutes, much less day after dayor in some cases year after year. I have been trying to getestablished in the entertainment industry for years. Getting in this particular industry is like cutting down an oak tree with a pocketknife. It's not impossible but during the process you can't help butwonder if there is another way. I've been cutting away for a longtime but focus and courage keep me going. You need to have couragebecause there will be a lot of voices, internal and external, thatwill try to convince you to stop and cut your losses. There have beenplenty of people that tell me my goals are crazy and that I shouldquit and get a "regular" job. And when things don't materialize asanticipated, it's easy to believe what is being said. But couragewill help you stay the course no matter what anyone says, includingthe voice in your own head. That, my friend, is tenacity. Tenacity gives you the audacity to ignore catastrophe (<--Feel free to use my quote). Tenacity is a fierce burning inside you that won't letanybody or anything stop you from attaining what you want. When you are tenacious, you will hear certain things constantly. "You neverlisten to anybody". "You think you're all that". "You never admit when you're wrong". "If you would have listened to me that never would have happened". Does any of this sound familiar? Don't worry,you aren't the only one who has to listen to these statements. These unhelpful remarks let you know you're on the right track. Taking action is an extremely important and time-consuming step. However, you'll never get anywhere if you don't move. Whether it's a good ideato move or not is another question but you won't know until you try. Of course, planning is necessary but don't get so caught up in preparation and deliberation that you forget about implementation(<--getting my Jesse Jackson on).

There you have it. Now you know how to win in Spades and win inlife. It seems simple, doesn't it? Just remember it only SEEMS thatway. In the game of Spades, in order to win 10 books in a hand youhave to play smart because there is little room for error. Life isnot much different. You have to be smart about your decisions. Whereyou are in life, right now, is a direct extension of the decisionsyou've made in the past. There is nothing you can do about your past. But you can start right now to make changes that will positivelyinfluence your future. Spades is just a pasttime. Life is not. Thedecisions you make concerning your life have a little more impact onthe world than a card game.

"Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but usually manages topick himself up, walk over or around it, and carry on." - WinstonChurchill

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com

*Word you've never heard...

omphalous /AHM-fuh-lahss/ noun - a central point: hub, focal point

The Catalyst

Did you miss me?


I know I haven't sent out any awe-inspiring emails as of late.However, I've been in my hibernaculum* getting rested and readybecause spring is on its way and I'm ready for winter to end. I haveall new topics to rant and rave about so without further ado let's getstarted. Boy, people have been letting me have it because I didn'tvote during the primaries. To be honest, I've never voted. I'm notbragging just stating a fact. You may wonder why. It's not that I'magainst voting. It's just not that high on my to-do list. I couldcare less who is President. I know the choices the President makeshas an impact on all of our lives but I don't believe his influence isgreater than our own influence. It shouldn't anyway. I know whatyou're thinking. "Rallo, our ancestors died for us to have the rightto vote." That's true but they also died for me to have the right toown a gun. So does that mean I'm being disrespectful if I don't haveone. Our ancestors also died so that we can have an education but Ican tell by the ratings of the Flava of Love 3 that we aren'tutilizing that right. Last but not least our ancestors died so thatwe could have the right to not give a (fill in your own blank). So ifvoting isn't as important to me as it is to you, sue me!

People are under the false assumption that change starts at the top (the President). It doesn't. Change starts from the bottom (the people). No matter who the President is gas prices will continue torise as long as people buy it. Gas prices aren't high because GeorgeBush is evil. Gas prices are high because of the basic economicprinciple of supply and demand. When demand is high, prices are high.Oh yeah, A DAY-LONG BOYCOTT OF GAS WILL NOT MAKE THE PRICE GO DOWN(so please quit circulating those emails). Put yourself into themindset of a CEO of a multi-billion dollar oil company. You could setthe price of your oil at one price and make $1 billion or you couldset a slightly higher price and make $10 billion. Which would youchoose? Of course, I should have known some of you goodie goodieswhere going to choose the lower price (which would explain why youwould never have a multi-billion dollar corporation in the firstplace). But for the rest of us, the $9 billion profit differentialis too big to ignore. I don't think making as much profit as possibleis greedy. If over charging for products is wrong, what about oilchanges for your car? Or Air Jordan Basketball shoes? Or Super Bowlcommercials? I said all that to say this: The President won't have asbig an impact on the economy than the collective effort of the generalpublic spending their money judiciously.

One reason I don't vote is because I don't trust the candidates. I'mnot saying they ALL lie but politicians generally leave me skeptical. Because of politicians I know how women feel when they see menapproaching. Ladies, you know how it is when a man speaks to you. Nomatter how sweet and debonair he may sound, you already know all hewants to do is smack it up, flip it, rub it down oh nooooo! Politicians tell you what you want to hear and as soon as you vote forthem, they're back in Washington D.C. spending our tax dollars on anew desk and office furniture. There is another group of people thatwill tell you what you want to hear just to get something from you. We refer to them as crack heads. "Rallo, are you comparing BarackObama to a drug addict?" No, not at all. Well, I guess I am, kindof. I'm just saying that dealing with crack heads and politicianswill leave you with the same thing: No change.

Though I don't spend much time in politics, I must say that this is apretty exciting time in American history. It hasn't even been a year since protesters rallied against nooses being hung in trees (yes, it still happens) yet we have a black man with a legitimate chance ofwinning the Presidency. Hillary Clinton has a fighting chance ofbeing our first woman President. Of course, you still have JohnMcCain. There is nothing historical about him if he wins. He'll justbe another rich white man who became Commander-In-Chief. I'm surethat makes rich white people happy but it sucks for the rest of us. But then again, what else is new?

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether itexists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrongremedy."--Ernest Benn

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-Americanwww.rallostyles.com
www.blestbabyproductions.com (<--NEW! See what I'm up to now)

*Word you've never heard...

hibernaculum /hy-ber-NAK-yuh-lum/ noun - a shelter occupied duringthe winter by a dormant animal

The Catalyst

Hello Good People,

Although I have realized this for a while, I must reiterate the fact that we live in a crazy world. I used to think there were rules in place to keep everything together. But the more I live the more I work out to my own satisfaction that anything can happen at anytime for no reason at all. The good news is I, and hopefully you, realize how crazy the world is. I believe that as long as you recognize how crazy and unstable the world can be you’ll be ok. As soon as you start trying to make sense of the world, you’re screwed.
You may be saying to yourself, “Rallo, what do you mean when you say the world is crazy?” Just look around and you will see the craziness is its ridiculous splendor. I never understood how a 20oz. soda costs more than a 2-liter. I can’t understand why the government let drugs in the country and prosecutes the people who use and sell it. Why do we kill people that kill people to show that killing people is wrong? Is “New York” (from I Love New York fame) cute in an unattractive way or is she unattractive in a cute way? I could go on all day but I realize that some things don’t deserve an explanation. Being human, I have a tendency to want to ask the eternal question, “why?” Then I get frustrated because I can’t find an adequate answer.
It’s natural to ask questions. As children our questions are rather simple. Why is the sky blue? A knowledgeable parent would say that the sky is blue because of light refracting off of debris in the atmosphere. Sure this question may be difficult for the uninformed but the answer is a science book away. Problems arise, however, as we get older and our questions get harder and the answers become vague. What is my purpose? Where was I before I was born? Where does my mind go when I’m sleep? And of course, what happens after I die? The answers to these questions depend on what you are willing to believe. I believe the world is a wide-open smorgasbord that will give you your fill if you’re willing to ask for what you want without worrying about the details. We sometimes concern ourselves with details because deep down we all are control freaks. Our attention to detail can function as a facade so that we don’t make an attempt to accomplish our goals. We won’t pull the trigger on an idea because we have to wait until we have ALL the answers and everything is PERFECT. We use the excuse of not being ready because half the time we are just scared of failure. The truth is your situation will never be perfect and without failure success is impossible. Most millionaires never knew exactly how they were going to become successful. They just knew. I don’t know how electricity works but I don’t have to know how it works in order for me to make an attempt to switch on the lights. We should approach life with the same carelessness. I’m not saying you should not plan. Planning is imperative. But it doesn’t take 10, 15, or 40 years to develop a strategy.
As I always say, embrace the chaos. The world is a ruthless place. You can’t even go to school without worrying about getting shot. When I was in school, the biggest crisis was teens killing other teens over Air Jordan tennis shoes. Now, kids shoot up schools for attention. You have criminals going on a shooting rampage, in a courtroom no less, and don’t get me started on suicide bombers. Security is a mirage, people. You should never feel that you are ever safe. Of course, I don’t want you to constantly worry about death. But you do have to realize that tomorrow is not promised. Every night when you get home you should be grateful that you made it. Don’t get used to taking life for granted. This world does not owe you a (fill in your own blank) thing and it will constantly remind you of that fact. Meditate on this word, satori. Satori is a Latin term that translates loosely in English as “attention to the moment”. All you should be concerned with is right now. The future hasn’t happened yet and the past can’t hurt you (unless you want it to but that’s another topic). It is a possibility that 5 minutes from now a maniac can end your existence and the next thing you know you’re walking the esplanades* of Heaven asking, “What the (fill in your own blank) just happened?” Like I mentioned before, my goal is not to scare you. I just want you to be aware that trying to make sense out of the universe is futile. Nothing makes sense. The sooner you take heed to this fact the better. As long as you try to make sense out of life, you’ll continually be confused. Have faith and live your life to the fullest every single minute of every single day. Remember: Faith is about letting go not holding on.

“Time is not a line, but a series of now points.” - Taisen Deshimaru

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
http://thecatalystexperience.blogspot.com/


*Word you’ve never heard…

esplanade /ESS-pluh-nahd/ noun - a level open stretch of paved or grassy ground; especially : one designed for walking or driving along a shore

The Catalyst

Happy Valentine’s Day,

I hope you all will take the time today to make sure the one(s) you love feel appreciated. Myself, I will be joining the million members of the Lonely Hearts Club. You may have heard me speak glowingly of the First Lady in past Catalysts. I spent a full month talking about relationships only for my mate to dump me a few weeks later (talk about irony). I would go into detail but I will save that philippic* for The Catalyst (book). For once, there is a topic I have absolutely no clue about. Love is a strange paradox. You look for it although you know it is only a matter of time before it brings you pain. Love doesn’t always lead to hate but you can’t hate someone you didn’t have love for at some point.
I think I speak for everyone when I say that heartbreak is the worst pain you will ever feel. If you haven’t had your heart broken, you will. It is an inevitable part of life. I was naïve enough to think I could get love right on the first time. But I soon learned that no one is exempt. There is nothing like giving your all to someone only for them to tell you, in no certain terms, that your best is not good enough. For most men, it’s hard to be naked (emotionally) in front of their significant other. You don’t want to show your girlfriend/wife how vulnerable (human) you are. You don’t want to share your fears, regrets, or subjects that makes you sad. Men are supposed to be tough, right? I’m a little different, though. I’m brutally honest. If you want to know something, just ask. As a faithful reader of the Catalyst, you know that I speak truthfully and I’m highly critical. But just as I’m critical of others, I am equally critical of myself. Though I’m aware of my flaws, I don’t sit around all day and focus on them. This normally brings up a HUGE problem in my relationships. I’m an extremely secure person. I learned to accept myself a long time ago. I love my balding head, my big nose, my hairy exterior, and my obsession with non-fiction literature. The problem arises when I, being secure, get involved with an insecure female. People that hate themselves normally want you to hate yourself as well. If you don’t complain about your job, criticize the way you look in the mirror, or get jealous of others you get labeled as vain. However, there is a difference between confidence and conceit. It’s not that I don’t think my (fill in your own blank) stinks; I just realize that everybody (fill in your own blank) stinks and there is no reason to think mine smells any better or worse than anyone else’s.
Before you can love anybody, you MUST love yourself. No one will love you like you. My self-esteem is so high it floats into the atmosphere. I know that if I don’t love and respect myself, no one will. You can’t possibly expect someone else to make you feel valuable. You have to already know. You may say, “Rallo, I love and respect myself but my man still don’t treat me right”. I’m going to give you another example of my brutal honesty. If your man doesn’t show you appreciation or respect, you probably don’t show yourself appreciation and respect. Do you want to know how I know that? If you respected yourself, you would listen to your mom and not be with that knucklehead in the first place. You would know that you are too precious to be letting just any fool get next to you. In the past, I’ve always attracted damaged, insecure women in my life. Being the Dean of Positive University, I would blindly believe that with my attitude I could “save” her. With time I could show her that she is beautiful and that she is important. I felt that no matter how low her self-esteem was I could “fix” her. It never worked. In 2008, I’m no longer into science projects. I no longer look to “save” or “fix” anybody. The next woman I take a gamble on will not be emotionally high maintenance. She will have to accept herself including her flaws. I don’t mind giving compliments but I shouldn’t have to convince the lady of her worth. I now realize that if she can accept her shortcomings, she will also accept my shortcomings.
Don’t ever succumb to the belief that there is something wrong with being single. Your friends that are involved with someone probably wish they were you. When you are single you have options. You can date as many people as you like. Now, when I say date I don’t mean you have to have sex with everyone that invites you to dinner. Dating is the same as courting. I think that is the problem with couples. They choose to involve themselves with one person exclusively. After 8 months, they break up and have to start all over again. Save some time and date as many people as possible. Like I said, you don’t have to have sex with them but you can evaluate while getting to know them. You need to compare and contrast to narrow down your search. If one doesn’t work you have more to choose from. You have options. One more thing, get out of the house! Your future wife/husband isn’t going to come knocking at your door. It wouldn’t hurt to lose a few pounds and update that wardrobe a little, either. Despite what you think, your personal appearance is the most important thing. What better way to get noticed than to have a toned body encased in stylish threads? You just separated yourself from 90 % of the single population because you care how you look. To me, there is nothing sexier than a woman who takes pride in her appearance. But that’s just me. Some guys are into the sloppy, “I-ain’t-trying-to-impress-nobody” look. Fellas, it wouldn’t hurt to add a nice jacket and tie to your wardrobe of white tees, Timberlands, and Air Force Ones. Again that’s my opinion. Some women are into the “Grown-man-dressing-like-a-teenager” look. You may be thinking, “Rallo, a person should focus on the inside and not what I look like on the outside”. If you think like this, chances are you will be single for a very, very long time.

”You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”-- Buddha


Dream Big. Live Bigger.


The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
http://thecatalystexperience.blogspot.com/


*Word you’ve never heard…

philippic /fuh-LIP-ik/ noun - a discourse or declamation full of bitter condemnation: tirade

The Catalyst

Hello All,

Did you happen to see the Super Bowl? It was watched by close to 100 million people so chances are you were one of them. Being a football fan I can truly say it was the best Super Bowl I’d seen. I didn’t really care who won. I was caught in a bitter scission*. I didn’t want New England to win because I don’t like their team’s overall attitude. I didn’t want NY to win because I know a lot of New Yorkers and I didn’t want to hear their mouth for the next 6 months. The story line for the game fits into what I wanted to talk about this week. Despite the name “Giants”, the public gave them a small chance of winning against the undefeated (18-0) Patriots. I can relate to the Giants. I know what its like to be written off because of past performances.
Experts picked the Patriots to not just win but dominate the Giants,. Very few people believed in the Giants this season, including some of their players. Throughout our lifetime we go through similar situations. I’m sure you have had people tell you that you can’t do something. “You can’t go to college because not only are your grades below average, you’re poor.” “You’ll never be a supermodel with that nose.” Sadly, we are labeled during our formative years and we spend the rest of our lives placing limits on ourselves. Even worse, instead of trying to accomplish a goal to see if the detractors were correct in their assessments we won’t even try. “What’s the use of trying out for the basketball team? I’m not even 6 foot tall.” It is pretty much a guarantee that if you establish a low self-esteem as a child, you will carry that weight like an anchor your entire life. On top of that, you’ll grow up to be a detractor yourself. Anytime you see friends or even complete strangers attempting to better themselves you’ll bring up all the reasons why they can’t accomplish their goals. I love when people tell me I can’t do something. To be honest, I don’t get motivated about an idea unless someone tells me it’s an impossible feat.
I dream big. It’s not just a motto it’s a way of life for me. If you knew me personally you would know that I have a lot of ideas. My mind is constantly going. If you talk to me for just 5 minutes I will throw some many hair-brained schemes at you that you would think I’m insane (or drunk or both). But, I believe in me. I believe that with hard work and dedication anything is possible. The only problem I have is getting people to buy in to what I’m trying to do. If you’re a big idea person you probably run into this problem, too. It’s not that my ideas are that big. It’s just that 97% of our population thinks small. I’m sorry but I don’t think becoming a billionaire is impossible. But if I told someone my plans they would be like, “Man, how you gonna be a billionaire and you don’t even have a bank account (a true fact by the way)?” That’s the problem with small thinkers. Instead of thinking how possible something is they will focus on all the reasons why it can’t happen. If you know a person like this you need to distance yourself from them. Dead weight keeps you stationary. I know it’s hard to cut these people off because more times than not they are your closest friends and family. These are people who should encourage but instead they have such a low opinion of themselves that they see all of their failed attempts in your dreams. Sure, you all probably partied when you were younger but as you matured you wanted more out of life and your buddies became critical. A lot of times these detractors, or as we say on the street “Haters”, don’t even try. They just assume that anything that is not done already can’t be done. You must let go of these haters because you will NEVER succeed with these people in your life. I’ve gotten to the point that if a person isn’t striving to move ahead (seriously) I don’t even hang around them. I don’t visit. I don’t call. I used to try and motivate others to action. I have so much positive energy that I can give some to 4 people and still have more than I can use in a lifetime. However, if an individual lacks ambition it’s pointless. It took me a long time to realize this but thankfully I did. These so called friends will drag you down with them or at the very least keep you in place. I know what you’re thinking. “So and so had a bad childhood and I’m their only friend.” That may be true but that is not your problem. “So I should just turn my back on my friends?” If your friends aren’t helping you move toward your goals they are a hindrance. If your relationship is so close that you will sacrifice your dreams for your friend that is your business. But since your reading this Catalyst, you can never say you didn’t know any better.
Once again I would like to congratulate New York Giants fans for their victory. Nobody gave you all much of a chance. I, being the CEO of Positivism Inc. (fictitious), said that a Giants victory was, at least, possible. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE! The Patriots were perfect throughout the season. However, as we all know, the past is meaningless. You used to be so popular back in high school. Does that popularity have any benefits now? History lets you know what happened, THEN. Today is a new day. Make the most of it. You may not have been perfect in the past. Your past may have been downright (fill in your own blank) up! But how long will you use that excuse? There are people who have overcome tremendous obstacles to become successful. I’ve heard it said that success is a journey not a destination. If you’ve ever been on a road trip to the beach, you understand that the drive to the beach can be more fun than actually being there IF you’re with the right people.

“The things we hate about ourselves aren't more real than things we like about ourselves.”--Ellen Goodman

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
www.rallostyles.com
http://thecatalystexperience.blogspot.com/

*Word you’ve never heard…
scission /SIZH-un/ noun - the state of being cut, divided, or split

The Catalyst

How’s it going?

First, let me say thank you to everyone who has been open to follow me where I’ve been going with these last couple of Catalysts. To be honest, I’ve wanted to touch on this subject for a while. I was hesitant because I know people never like to be challenged. No one is relaxed outside of his or her comfort zone. For many people, religion is taboo and should never be scrutinized. I know because I’ve fallen victim to this train of thought. Once again, I do believe in God. I go to church, religiously (pun intended). I believe that the Bible is an incredible work and the philosophies that are shared within the covers are invaluable. However, when you break it down, the Bible is a book. And like any other book, the reader gives it meaning.
People think that when I discuss topics like free will and God’s Will that I’m being argumentative. Not so. I’m just bringing fresh new ideas. If you believe the same truths now that you believed 5 years ago you haven’t grown (mentally). You mean to tell me that you were never wrong about an idea and forced to change. If that’s the case chances are you probably have the same friends you’ve always had. You only hang around people that agree with you. You go to the same places to have fun and if this describes you that is fine. Live your life. But I wrote these past Catalysts for those who love radical, outside-the-box thinking. People look at religion for answers. Too bad you won’t find them because the source of all learning begins inside you. You have to know yourself before you will ever learn anything. Your perspective filters all the information your brain receives. Have you heard the term of looking through “rose (red) colored glasses”? If you’re wearing glasses with red tint, everything you see will have a reddish shade because that is the perspective you’re looking out of. The same thing happens in life. When you have a certain perspective, this point of view will filter everything you sense. That is why we disagree on topics such as religion. We all look out of different colored lenses. Remember when I said that you and me have different Gods? That is not true (see, I accepted a new truth in less than 2 weeks). We have the same God we just look at Him differently. It makes sense when you think about it. If you have brothers or sisters each of you will have a different image of your parents. That is why it is so important to begin inside when you’re seeking answers. If you want to change your circumstances you have to change your thinking. NO EXCEPTIONS! It’s that simple yet it’s that difficult. One of the hardest things to do is change your thinking or paradigm, if you will.
Change can be scary. You have become accustomed to behaving a certain way. If you were raised in the church like me you’ve been conditioned to act accordingly or face hellfire, brimstone, and eternal damnation. That is why you are scared to question the Bible. I can agree that the Bible is holy but it is still a man made book. God did not write it. He influenced it. God did not translate it. Men did, and hopefully, correctly. Can I keep it real? I don’t believe that God interferes in our lives. I believe God has given us all the power we need to dominate in this world. He’s given us the power to heal ourselves. We have the power to bless and curse. We can give and take life. You don’t pray for a cut to heal but you’ll pray if you get diagnosed for cancer. Your body is designed to heal itself. You pray for a new car but all you have to do is save your money. I’m not taking anything away from God. He has blessed us with tremendous abilities. It’s just sad that we are so dependent on Him we rarely utilize them. We are like 30 year olds who still live with Momma (no offense to whom this applies). If we would just act right we wouldn’t need God to perform miracles all the time. Everything God is going to do for you has already done. The rest is up to us. You’re sitting there waiting on God to act and in reality He’s waiting on you. Don’t foozle* your life away. You have developed your identity based on your routine thoughts so if you change your thoughts, you will inevitably change who you are. To some, that may be liberating. To others, that is frightening. You will think to yourself, if I change I will no longer be me. If I’m not me, who will I be? What will the church folk think if I don’t agree with the pastor on a particular point? Will my friends like the new me? Probably not. Trust me, I know. But the new you will bring new, better friends. And even if you don’t (which is highly unlikely), as long as you love yourself you will have all the company you need.
If you haven’t learned anything just remember this: God is not going to be mad at you for asking questions. He wants us to understand Him. One of my main questions is how come God doesn’t help everyone in need. I’m not talking about a little extra money until payday. I’m talking about Hurricane Katrina and 9/11. He had the power to prevent these catastrophes but He didn’t. What up with that? True story: I lived in an apartment and I heard a man beating his wife and kids. One would expect that I do something. I knew I had the power to go over there and interrupt the tumult. I could also call the police. I could have minded my own business but what would that say about me? I prayed. I asked what I should do. God told me that the decision to act would be completely mine. He also said that my choice would not lead Him to view me any differently. Then I asked why He didn’t do anything to help. God replied that help was already there. I asked where it was because I didn’t see it. The Lord said the help was praying and waiting for answers. Sometimes it’s better to act than look for signs. If you truly have faith you will never need anyone to validate your decisions.

“I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.” - Galileo Galilei

Dream Big. Live Bigger.

The All-American
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*Word you’ve never heard…

foozle /FOO-zul/ verb - to manage or play awkwardly: bungle